Wednesday, April 28, 2010

ASK THE UTH ADVISORS


I have a problem concerning a relationship and I hope you can help me. I met ‘Marcia’ seven years ago, when my mother died. It was a real bad time for me because my mother and I were really close. I loved her very much. she had six children and out of all her children, I was the only one who stayed out of trouble. I was always there for her through the rough times.

I met Marcia at my mother’s funeral. I really fell for Marcia because she was comforting and loving and she helped me when I was at a really low point. She knows I love her and would do anything for her. She says she loves me too and I believe that she does. But I could never understand why, when everything is going good for us, she always does something to mess things up. It’s like self sabotage, like she’s afraid to be happy or she doesn’t trust the feeling. In one breath she tells me she can’t live without me, and in another she tells me she doesn’t want to see me anymore. I really want to be with her but I don’t know how much more I can take.

Dr. Suni says: Dear R,
I gather from your account that you and Marcia want to be together, or you wouldn’t have stayed together seven years. I don’t know if you had any kind of counseling for this “problem,” but I would suggest first of all that you get some relationship counseling. Do you have a Minister that you can talk with? If not, ask around, call up some worship centers, find a Minister who does relationship counseling. Of course you both would attend counseling.

I see a trust issue. Something traumatic happened that affected Marcia, either during the relationship or before, that’s causing Marcia to hold onto fear. it’s a deep-seated fear and it has created a blockage in her emotional body. If the trust issue started during your relationship, then relationship counseling would help. If counseling does not resolve the issue, then I suggest hypnotherapy. Hypnotherapy can quickly find the cause and cancel it. Of course this would have to be individual therapy, and Marcia would have to decide this for herself.

Aside from these suggestions, you need to pray and meditate daily. Meditation and prayer are powerful means to find answers to your problems. If you need help with learning how to meditate and pray effectively, please send us an email to heal@temple-of-healing.org.  

I hope these suggestions help. wishing you love, light and harmony.

Ask the UTH Advisors is posted every Wednesday. Send your questions to: advice@temple-of-healing.org. We request the right to publish your question without identifying you for the sake of helping others with similar issues.