ASK DR. SUNI

There’s something missin in my life and I don’t know what. My husband and I have grown away from each other. After twenty two years of marriage and three children I feel like I’m stifling. My youngest child is graduating high school this year and going to college. The other two are already out on their own. I think I’m going to go crazy with just my husband and me in the house. I don’t really like my work but at least it helps to pay the bills. I’ve been having an affair just out of boredom. I think he’s having an affair too but I don’t even care. Is this some midlife crisis or what?

Dear B,

I’m glad that you wrote for advice. I don’t think it’s mid-life crisis, I think you need more purpose to you life. You don’t have a passion for your work, you don’t have a passion for your life. I suggest you find a creative outlet for your pent-up emotions or you may be headed for depression. First of all I suggest you start a diary. We at Universal Temple of Healing call it a Self-Discovery Journal. Write at least one page every morning. it could be on anything—dreams, hopes/wishes, plans for the day, thoughts about what happened yesterday, etc. Take your journal with you and write whenever you feel tense, stressed or anxious. Write down any uncontrollable urges you have to eat or do anything else. Remember to always write the date each day. 

Next I suggest you do some volunteer work. Work in a soup kitchen, visit the sick, find a way to perform some kind of service, and volunteer. This will take your mind off yourself and you’ll find your life beginning to have purpose. Then if you still have time to spare, take an art class, or a yoga class, or join a book club. There are so many things you can do to bring joy into your life. Start now.

Wishing you love, light and harmony.

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